Hello Sweetie

malekith:

malekith:

malekith:

oh my god i dont have a gag reflex

update i just stuck a fork down my throat and nothing happened its official im going to be a prostitute this is the only way to utilize these skills

update my mother just walked in on me trying to shove the remote down my throat

(via nomiddle-namewilson)

rottenflesh-and-brokenbones:

when I was little, I went through a phase where I’d wear my Spiderman costume under all my clothes, so I wore it for about 3 years straight and my mom never found out until one day when we were at a family party, I was wearing the costume under a really fancy and expensive dress, and someone started choking on something so I ripped off the dress to reveal the costume to try and save them, and I think my mom just about had a heart attack

(via youreawizardsophie)

3ridan:

do not read old chat logs of someone you used to be close to do not read old chat logs of someone you used to be close to do not read old chat logs of someone you used to be close to

(Source: lapfoxs, via karenssgillan)

codons:

this girl who rode my bus once came up to me and was like “oh my god dont get offended or anything but are you GAAAAAAAAAAY?!” and i was like yeah and then she was like “OH MY GOD WE HAVE TO HANG OUT AND GO SHOPPING” and i was like “dont get offended or anything but are you ASIAN?!” and she was like “omg yeah im filipino” and i was like “OH MY GOD WE HAVE TO MAKE SPRING ROLLS AT YOUR HOUSE SOME TIME” and she never talked to me again 

(via menagerelle)

stop making villains so attractive it makes me question my morals

(Source: bex-chan, via nomiddle-namewilson)

do you ever want to punch yourself in the face for liking someone a lot

(Source: ectogasmic, via bleeeach)